How It Feels To Be Intentionally Forgotten After 15 Years
Here’s the thing… I get sad. I get emotional… I’m human… I’m a real person… and sometimes I take things way too personally.
… These are indeed my comments on facebook‘s updated profile picture.
I’ll probably be embarrassed about the comments later and delete them… as well as this blog… but in the meantime… I’m sad… and emotional…
I didn’t know how hurt I’d end up feeling about the change to facebook‘s look after 15 years.
… I’m just so forgotten… and it’s intentional like I have always felt it was… but now it just feels so official.
I can understand the color change to best suit the Dark Mode option in messenger. Thus making the change necessary.
But… further altering the logo centring the “f” when it was originally off centre to the right for a reason… just makes me take it all very personal.
… I don’t expect anyone to understand… because nobody knows the things Mark Zuckerberg and I used to talk about and the promises that were made between us.
One of the things we had discussed was him eventually forgetting about me and not keeping his promises to me in the future… because I had this immense gut feeling that was going to be the reality once fame and fortune entered the picture…
Because I have always believed that people generally change and forget about the helpful and supportive people that are always present in the beginning of the journey to their success…
… but not only that… I was promised a small percentage of Mark’s personal facebook shares and I had nothing legally binding to that verbal agreement that Mark made with me… I had to rely entirely on Mark keeping his word to me…
During that discussion he made additional promises to me that he’d never forget about me and I would never be turned away from facebook…
I kept every promise I ever made to him…
… but he didn’t keep his promises that he made me.
I might be a little extra emotional about all of this because…
I have been having a very difficult time for the last several months now with some serious issues in my life that have been extremely challenging for me to deal with on my own…
I wish I had support and someone to talk to and give me a hug… but I don’t have the luxury of having any true/real friends in my life.
I’m alone… always alone in everything I do and go through in life.
… and because of all that It’s hard not to feel like the universe is constantly conspiring against me with the amount of unfortunate happenings in my life.
… sometimes I’m like… “Is this really my real life… or a nightmare?”… or does God “hate” me… or just forgot about me?…
I didn’t need another thing to add to the sadness I’ve been feeling.
But … unfortunately that is just my luck in this life… “When it rains it always pours.”
I fully understand the importance for facebook to move forward and further evolve to best suit the needs of billions of people world wide… I’m greatly supportive of that. I have always wanted the best for facebook.
It’s not about me or the feelings and memories I have clung onto all these years but that doesn’t stop me from feeling the emotions that I feel from time to time because I am forgotten.
The ultimate thing that bothers me the most is…
Thinking Mark had to of thought about the history of these things that were being changed… before changing them…
and knowing that… It makes me very sad that Mark didn’t think of reaching out to me at all or wondered how I’ve been doing all these years and how my life has been impacted by everything that happened, or how I would personally feel about the new changes to facebook after 15 years.
While I’ve tried everything trying to reach him including making this website/blog because I’ve exhausted all other options.
That further makes me feel that steps are still being taken to intentionally erase me from having any part in facebook‘s history.
The old logo was original. It also had meaning to it. The new logo now is completely unoriginal. Looks like the family channel logo… literally. Why in the world would Mark or anyone else let this happen to facebook???… ugh.
I used to be the person Mark would come to; to make the best decisions possible. There is no way I would have approved this new logo.
#1 The old logo was original… it had meaning.
#2 Millions of Companies have the original logo on their products… now they have to change it.
#3 It looks like the family channel logo.
#4 It will look too similar next to other apps that are a similar blue.
#5 … Just centring the “f” was just all around a bad move… Being off centre to the right was Original… plus it carried meaning even though nobody really knew the meaning behind it.
Being an influence during the creation of facebook was the biggest most important thing I had ever had the pleasure of doing in my life…
But the unfortunate reality is 15 years later I remain unacknowledged… just completely forgotten… written off.
It’s sad for me.
It is very hard not to take things personal considering it’s been 15 years later and I am still forgotten… I am not acknowledged at all for my influences and involvement with facebook in the beginning in any way.
I was alienated… entirely written off and forgotten… While nobody really knows the story or really cares… it’s very sad and heartbreaking to live life with that reality. It has affected my life very negatively through the years and it is what I have to live with everyday.
I try my best to accept things and try my best to stay positive and hopeful… making peace with everything but it’s very challenging at times.
Nobody likes to be forgotten.
Screenshot Caption: “…Unless you are the real person behind the alias of “Jessica Alona”… then you are purposely ignored and excluded from this mission of bringing the world closer together.”
For me personally that is what the reality feels like behind facebook‘s motto of “Bringing the world closer together.”