15 years ago on this day Jan 3, 2004.

MZ_JA_1_White center

I never thought that 15 years later…
The first week of January 2004 would end up being one of the most memorable times for me in my life. It was the beginning of a New Year, It was exciting to think that 2004 was going to be the greatest year my life… with all the promises Mark Zuckerberg made me while we were discussing the upcoming launch of thefacebook.com Mark lit the biggest spark of hope in my heart that my struggles in life will soon be over. I was also turning 20 years old in a few days and I was being a bit of a smartass to Mark about it. I remember joking around with Mark about him being so young and how I will no longer be a teenager in a few days but He will still be one for 5 more months. Even though Mark was only 5 months younger than I, I liked being silly teasing Mark about being younger and looking about 14 or 16 years old at 19.

When we were discussing the anticipated launch of thefacebook.com and making plans I mentioned that my birthday was in a few days. Mark said he didn’t realize that my birthday was coming up so soon, He then said “If I would have thought of it, We could have lunched thefacebook.com on the 5th a day before your birthday but with your birthday 3 days away that is way too early to launch thefacebook.com .”

Even though it was impossible, That was the most thoughtful thought in the World… It made me feel very appreciated and valued for the help and support that I offered Mark. Nobody had ever made me feel valued, listened to and important like Mark had often made me feel.

During the evening Mark and I had gotten into some deep discussions about the future… Mark said if thefacebook.com really takes off He’ll help me out and make me really rich. Right away I said “I don’t believe you.” because it sounded too good to be true. Mark replied “I’m serious, I won’t pass up the opportunity to change your life.” I then said “I’d seriously be forever thankful if he made me a Millionaire.” That’s when he corrected me and said “I wouldn’t make you a millionaire…” followed by a long pause which in the moment felt like forever… then followed up with saying “I’d make you a Billionaire.” Keep in mind none of us really knew the real potential… This was just 2 teenagers day dreaming together of possibilities and etc. but the day dream bubble popped when reality swooped on in real quick after he said that so I said “I don’t have that kind of luck in life.” That is when I also said “One day you are going to forget about me and you will never honor your promise that you made me. Because nobody ever remembers the people that were there for them in the beginning of their success.” I said that because that is what I believed to be true. Mark replied with disbelief in what I had just said and asked me why I had thought that way and I said “I’m always forgotten by people.” and Mark reassured me that moment that he would never forget me and will honor his promise to me no matter what.

I said thefacebook.com will be so big that he will end up being super rich and famous… We’d lose touch and I will never be able to reach him ever again. Because he’d be so sheltered and will probably even have bodyguards and everything making it impossible for me to ever reach out to him successfully.
Mark laughed and said “I doubt I will be that Rich and famous… it’s not like I’d be building things like Bill Gates.” I said “That doesn’t matter… I just have a feeling thefacebook.com will be huge.”
I then said “We need to make plans now that we will never lose touch.” Mark laughed and said “We won’t lose touch.” I said “I really fear that we will… and we need to make sure it doesn’t happen.” so we discussed several different ways that I could always try to reach him… one of the agreements was to keep the email account that we communicated through active for the next 10 years… just so I will always have that security knowing I will never be able to lose touch with him no matter what… at the time I didn’t have a cellphone we didn’t text we e-mailed, and of course there where several other plans in place beside that.

Looking back How right was I about everything?.

During our more serious discussions during the first week of January Mark wanted to figure out how to divide shares in thefacebook.com among investors and offered me a small percentage of his personal shares… He said I’d be a silent partner that way. While I was very ecstatic about the offer I also felt a lot of doubt. I really did so in that moment I got up off my computer chair and knelt down on the side of my bed and prayed really hard… like REALLY REALLY HARD to God that… I hope that he was listening to everything Mark and I had been discussing… and that Facebook really would be the biggest success… and that all these promises would come true so that I wouldn’t have to struggle in life anymore.

Life was just so hard for me… and still is… in fact it got even harder bearing this burden I’ve kept to myself all these years, as well as the various forms of vulnerability that comes with it all. For example, I opened up about my story and my true identity to a well known and respected professor from Harvard. Long story short a year ago he flew down to my city uninvited and unannounced and was peering through the windows of my home. After that I blocked him across all forms of social media. I attempted to expose him but he threatened to sue me for Defamation of character, Slander and Libel. So what does a poor vulnerable girl with all credibility taken from her do?…EXACTLY!!… Nothing. I can’t even mention who he is or say all the terrible things he has done. He added alot of stress to my life and while I lose sleep over this individual every night, There is no justice for myself and many others, and that is the latest struggle added to my life. This is why I never wanted to publicly reveal my true identity to anyone, but I thought if this man is from Harvard and well respected I could trust him, Bad mistake.

Now back to the main story as I was praying I heard Mark sending several more messages so I hurried up with my prayers so I could get up to read what Mark was saying which turned out to be more promises… and more reassurance. He then said he had to go and we said goodbye for the night and that is when I immediately went to my Mom’s room and jumped on her bed and layed beside her… and said “Mark Zuckerberg wants to make me a Billionaire! One day. Not a Millionaire but a BILLIONAIRE MOM!” my Mom looked at me in disbelief and said “I don’t believe that.” I said “No really Mom! he’s a computer genius! He has made several websites and things already! and he really promised to help us better our lives.” My Mom then said “What is his name again?” I said “Mark Elliot Zuckerberg.” I then said “Lets write his name down on your Calendar so we never forget this day.” So on My Mom’s 2004 Calendar on the month of January she wrote Mark Elliot Zuckerberg.

A year later the early months of 2005 my fears became a reality our friendship and communication got severed due to a huge disagreement.

Few months later December 2005 my Mom and I moved out of our apartment because we couldn’t afford the rent. A few years later My Mom was cleaning her room and That calendar ended up on a table in her room and happened to be opened on that page. I was in my bedroom when my brother happened to walk into my Mom’s bedroom He then glanced over at the calendar and I heard him say “Mom, Why is Mark Zuckerberg’s name written on your calendar? You don’t know who Mark Zuckerberg is.” I heard my Mom reply “Your sister made me write his name down a long time ago.” My brother then immediately walked into my room and said “Why would you get Mom to write Mark Zuckerberg’s name on her Calendar?” I simply said “Because he was my friend.” and I didn’t bother saying anything else about it. My brother looked at me and said “YEAH! OOOKAY! you aren’t even on thefacebook.com ” I said “That is because I was the first person to ever delete my facebook account.” He just said “Whatever.”

Shortly after that I signed up for a new facebook account and that was when I attempted to reach out to Mark Zuckerberg but Dustin stepped in and humiliated me publicly on Mark’s facebook wall for all to see… this was approx. 2006 or 2007. It seriously devastated me I was so upset that someone could be so cruel to me.

So just like every New Year on this day… I relive those memories and Hope that Mark will remember me as facebooks anniversary approaches.

Merry Christmas?

FFE3B604-439A-4C71-9F96-086471B7110E

It’s Christmas Eve. Merry Christmas!

Christmas has always been a confusing time for me yet it is my favourite time of the year… No; it’s not because of presents. I’m one of those people that always thinks of everyone yet nobody ever cares to think of me. Which I didn’t always take very well, but I learned to accept that reality through the years. So why is it my favourite time of year then? Christmas is my favourite time of year because it is the only time of year where most people tend to be more kind and charitable to others. Witnessing people being kind and thoughtful to others is always nice to see. It’s passing by strangers in the street that say Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays. It’s the Christmas movies on TV that almost always have some useful moral to be learned. It’s reading or watching stories in the News about people helping others that I really enjoy. It’s also a time I do a lot of self reflection While also asking myself why is it that during the holiday season people seem to be more kinder, more helpful more giving to others? Why is this behaviour generally so limited during the rest of the year? Are we just programmed that way? Kind of superficial in observation.

I grew up having mixed feelings about Christmas. I grew up very poor, my mom was a single mother, she has Schizophrenia. A few times we’d have a tree for Christmas and, other times my mom would throw our tree in the garbage and say Christmas is evil and sometimes we just didn’t have the money for a Christmas tree so I’d make my own Christmas tree out of news paper or anything I could find. One time I took some wire coat Hangers and taped them together onto a piece of cardboard and wrapped silver Christmas garland that I found around the coat hangers… it was kind of cute I remember being proud that I created something out of stuff I had found but… it was also sad looking at it knowing we couldn’t afford a tree and when I’d express my sadness over not having a proper tree my mom would say nobody is supposed to partake in Christmas anyway. so that is what always made Christmas a little confusing for me. I never had a big beautiful tree thus far in my lifetime, while that used to bother me every Christmas I am okay with that now. The last 6 years I had a little Charlie Brown Christmas tree as a reminder that I never had the Christmas tree that I always dreamed of having,I really loved that tree! But my cat broke it last year! So no Charlie Brown Tree this Christmas. Maybe next year.

How do I feel about Mark Zuckerberg and facebook being in the news a lot lately?

180319122433-facebook-mark-zuckerberg-780x439
Picture of Mark Zuckerberg from CNN Business

Someone asked me a few weeks ago “How do you feel about Mark Zuckerberg and facebook being in the news a lot lately?”

To answer the question in all honesty it doesn’t sit with me very well. Like a lot of people I feel disappointed but my disappointment goes a little deeper because I also can’t help but feel like If only I wasn’t alienated from facebook I could have helped prevent a lot of things that has happened in the past, and I think a lot of people may genuinely feel that they too could have helped the situation but the difference is I used to look out for Mark and his best interests weather it was personal or to do with facebook and I just naturally fell into that role because I genuinely cared about Mark and believed in him even at times when he was very discouraged and didn’t believe in himself.

Reflecting back on my friendship with Mark, Mark and I made a good team. I had a different way about looking at things; I’ve always been a deep thinker, an over analyzer, I’d predict the outcome of things all the time. I am intuitive and I would constantly challenge Mark to do better.

Besides Mark Zuckerberg himself I like to think that there is nobody else in this world that cares about facebook and the integrity behind it more than me. Nobody knows how true that is other than Mark that’s one reason why Mark insisted that my initial be secretly hidden in the facebook logo, but Perhaps Mark forgot those important facts long ago.

I know Mark surrounds himself with all kinds of advisors with various professional credentials and at times It is probably quite difficult to figure out which advice is best and what is not when things come down to ultimate integrity of facebook. It has got to be difficult at times with over 2 Billion users Worldwide and to have to please everyone; mind you everyone has very different needs, wants and expectations especially Governments around the World like China. With the massive number of employees at facebook I can only imagine the challenges and difficulty on monitoring everyone’s work and decisions made. Most Employers hope their employees do their job and that is having faith that they will always do the right thing. As a speculator it seems like decisions made by employees need to be more closely looked into and reviewed more often. I think it is impossible for anyone else to fully put their hearts into facebook like Mark Zuckerberg himself does there for there is going to be half assed advice and advice that is just terrible from time to time no matter how wise, how professional, how educated an advisor or an employee is and I can only imagine how hard it must be from time to time making sure you’re making the right decisions and choosing to listen to the right advice. Nobody is perfect. People make mistakes all the time. I think I proved myself in the past to Mark that my integrity was exceptional. He knew he could always faithfully count on me but I think influence of others may have helped distort that bit of reality because here I am still left out in the dark, vulnerable and on my own after all these years which has impacted my life very negatively. I cared a great deal about Mark’s dream to connect the World he knew that because I proved it in the time I spent offering advice and ideas while attentively making plans for his future, he trusted me. This desire to pursue his dream started long before being accepted into Harvard. Mark programed all kinds of various things including a program that completely destroyed my Hard drive on my first computer which was an Acer Aspire T100 Desktop, I’ll never forget that! and if that incident had never happened I wouldn’t have learned how to fix computers all on my own. Mark also made Zuck Net for his Dad’s Dental office and before facebook there was facemash and a few earlier variations of what would later become facebook. I don’t know why those details are purposely left out of the facebook story. I’m guessing and assuming it was an advised decision that was made to leave out of the Story. Some people may or may not remember Mark used to use MySpace to get people to join his social media sites. There are a lot of facts left out including my influential part of the story of course and I was in favor at the time to leave my story out because privacy was just more important to me.

As years went by and I got older I started to realize the importance of not holding back the truth especially when it comes to your life story. All your experiences, the people you meet on your life journey, the success, the failures, the hard times, the best times, the challenging times, the mistakes made, all the moments and experiences that automatically engrave themselves in our memories make us who we are. It is easy to forget and become forgotten in life when we leave those little important facts out. If you don’t speak up for yourself and leave important things out It’s like throwing away credentials and identity that you may never get back. That is a mistake I made that I live with everyday. I am not acknowledged for my early influence on facebook and the way years have been coming and going without any change in the situation I probably never will be acknowledged and the thing that troubles me a lot about that is wondering if Mark Zuckerberg really thinks I am okay with that and what happened between our friendship, collaboration and business agreements. I was never okay with what happened between Mark and my silent partnership with facebook. My life was negatively impacted young and because of that I wasted almost half of my life away thus far. Hiding myself from the world hardly ever leaving my home.

Integrity has always been important to me. Everyone that had ever had the pleasure of knowing me know that. Often I’ve been told I’m the most conscientious person they have ever known and I wish that Mark would remember that fact about me and remember that even though I am not perfect. I am human, I have feelings and everything that happened really hurt me a lot.

Earlier on in 2004 I already sensed and knew it was only a matter of time that I’d be forgotten and every promise made to me would be broken because I have always been aware that Money, Fame, Power and Image change people and I also warned Mark that Greed of others will likely find a way to taint facebook‘s integrity and to be careful of that.
and that is what I feel is partly to blame but that is just my speculation on the situation. I’ve been in the dark all these years, I don’t know the situation or how things are handled at facebook today so I can’t really comment too much.

Seeing facebook a lot more in the news this past year… It is just is a constant reminder that facebook forever haunts me… and no matter what It always will there is no escaping it.

I live my life everyday carrying a huge burden on my soul that I was not able to be there for Mark and facebook the way that I wanted to from day 1. Seeing and hearing about Mark Zuckerberg and facebook more and more these days is hard and it just makes me wish that I could speak to Mark so much more than ever because I have so much I would like to tell him.

I wish things could have been different everyday but sadly wishing can’t alter the past. Nobody can change the past and the mistakes made. All we can do is learn from it and make an effort to do better now and onward.

At this time I think Artificial Intelligence is not advanced enough to handle most problems at facebook There needs to be more human support to assist and improve AI in managing problems and issues.

From my experience on the outside of things people have been seeking and demanding more Human support because the AI automation often fails to help people with their issues. I get messages all the time complaining about the automated system and begging me to help them with their various account issues or get them in contact with a real person that can help them. I wish I could help but I can’t help anybody. I don’t have contact with anyone from facebook I too send in bug tickets and report things and I don’t get any responses either. There are a lot of areas facebook needs to improve on and that is one of them.

I wish Mark all the best and everyone along side him that have nothing but genuine interest in protecting the integrity of facebook and making the necessary changes to better serve the World.

Hopefully 2019 will be a better year maybe someone will even have a kind heart to help Mark and I reconcile our past issues.

Mark Zuckerberg, Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur and a Story about 3 Kippahs/Yarmulkes

Mark Zuckerberg blew his Shofar for his family on the 2nd Eve of Rosh Hashanah (The Jewish New Year) which begins the ten days of penitence culminating in Yom Kippur.

Mark Zuckerberg_Shofar1.png
Photo: Mark Zuckerberg gracefully holding his Shofar.

I love that Mark and Priscilla share special celebrations between both of their religious faiths with The World on facebook. I am one of those people that love to be exposed to different cultures and religion, It’s fascinating to learn about the differences and similarities in beliefs and practices of different religions and cultures.

Mark was the first and only person to ever say “G’mar Chatima Tova” to me; which translates as “May you be inscribed for Good in the Book of Life”.

When Mark and I were friends I had a cleaning job where I cleaned 11-13 buildings everyday 6 days a week for minimum wage. One of the buildings I used to clean was a Jewish Synagogue. I am not Jewish I was raised Catholic/Christian. I remember being fascinated by The Jewish faith and the things I’d come across as I cleaned the Synagogue.

Since it is Yom Kippur (The Day of Atonement, Known as the holiest day of the year in Judaism) and it being a time of atonement and repentance I’ll share a silly story that I once shared with Mark.

As I mentioned earlier in this blog as I cleaned The Jewish Synagogue I found myself fascinated by the faith and things I’d come across in the Synagogue. There was this wooden box full of Kippahs/Yarmulkes … At the time I was telling Mark Zuckerberg my Story I didn’t know the proper name for them so I called them “Jew Hats”. I remember Mark laughed at me then quickly corrected me, calling them Kippahs/Yarmulkes.
But anyway there was this wooden box of Kippahs/Yarmulkes and every time I’d walk past it or was sweeping or mopping the floor next to it I’d find myself looking at that box and wondering how they stayed on the back of Jewish men’s heads without falling off! YES!! I would seriously ponder this thought every time. Then one day my friend that was cleaning the Synagogue with me just randomly said to me “Hey don’t you ever wonder how these things stay on people’s heads without falling off?” and I was like “UHH YEAH!!! every time I look at this box!” and she was like “I wanna try one on but I’m to scared to inside the Synagogue incase it’s wrong.” I said “Yeah, me too.”… eventually curiosity got the best of us and my friend took two Kippahs/Yarmulkes and put them in her pocket and I took one and put it in my pocket. After work we tried them on and another friend of ours wore the 3rd one. We ended up driving around the city wearing them on our heads and yelling Shalom to everyone we passed by on the street. We even went to some stores wearing the Kippahs/Yarmulkes on our heads and were acting really silly. finally when we decided it was time to go home we felt really bad for taking the Kippahs/Yarmulkes and acting really silly with them so we agreed we needed to return them ASAP!… but we didn’t know how to make it not obvious that we took them so… our plan was to stick them in the Mail slot in the main door to the Synagogue. So we acted out this whole Mission Impossible scene on our way to the Synagogue doors, doing summersaults and crawling on the lawn and hiding between bushes and stuff that lead to the path to the front doors… while making silly mission impossible noises finally when we reached the door of the Synagogue we shoved those Kippahs/Yarmulkes into the mail slot and ran for our lives back to the Car. Curiosity got the best of us, Still feel a bit guilty about what we did, but I guess at some point in our lives we all do silly things we regret. It’s up to us to make an effort to learn from our wrongs, Do what’s right and develop good character in our life time.

Shana Tova (a good and sweet year) to all that Celebrate Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur G’mar Chatima Tova (May you be inscribed for Good in the Book of Life).

In The Summertime

In The Summertime By: Mungo Jerry has been playing alot on the Radio lately.

The funny thing about this song is I can’t listen to it without a goofy smirk on my face, because It always reminds me of Mark Zuckerberg
He once told me a story about how this song reminded him of his Dad.

YES!! I am REAL!…I Exist!

I am The Real Jessica Alona , The girl known as The “B!tch” that Mark Zuckerberg wrote about in his Live Journal 10.28.03.

MZLJ3.png

I am also known as “Erica Albright” a character played by actress Rooney Mara in the award winning movie The Social Network  — that was written by Aaron Sorkin and directed by David Fincher.

Yes, I really do exist… A lot of misconceptions have been made.
I had a bigger influence on Mark and facebook than what has been perceived.

I never came forward or revealed my true Identity publicly because
I never wanted fame. I wanted to maintain my privacy from the start for various reasons.

I was around prior, during and after the launch of www.thefacebook.com up until the early months of 2005. That is one of the many facts that people don’t know.

It’s Official!

I finally have my own Official Website.

I am flattered that there are people out there that are curious about who I am, and have taken the time and interest to create profiles and websites about me and the character “Erica Albright” from The Social Network movie.

But due to those fake profiles and websites a lot of misconceptions have been made which prompted me to create my own Official website.

This is my first website. I don’t have anyone helping me with it. I am doing it entirely on my own so there will be a lot of random revisions and changes to the site from time to time because I am self learning as I go.

The purpose of this website is to tell a bit about my story, Who I am, and what I am all about to those that are genuinely curious. I didn’t create this website to prove myself to anyone. If Mark still has hard feelings and wants to pretend I never existed. There is nothing I can do about that, but keep hoping that one day we can reconcile and move past the falling out that we had. Mark knows the truth regardless and that is all that truly matters.

%d bloggers like this: