Facebook Turns 16 Today…

Another year has gone by… and I still remain forgotten, and unacknowledged.

… I don’t really have much to say about it.

I always have a little extra hope in my heart that Mark would remember to think of me as the Anniversary of the launch of Facebook nears… and of course the day of I end up disappointed and it just turns out to be a very sad day for me because I get caught up in memories of every little thing we talked about back then and how the morning of February 4th 2004 Mark was just so excited about launching Facebook when he messaged me and I was just so happy…


I’ve reached out to a lot of people over the years… in hopes that someone would find a way to reconnect me with Mark…

I emailed Elliott Schrage January 14th… hoping that he’d read my email and let Mark Zuckerberg know that I’ve been trying to reconnect… I haven’t gotten a reply back… I expected that but I tried to remain hopeful.

… I saw Mark’s Silicon Slopes Tech Summit interview the other day.

When Mark was asked who his mentors were and who does he go to for advice… He didn’t mention anyone by name… he went on to state that he’s more religious now.

… Mark and I have been out of touch for a very long time. It’s been years since he came to me for advice… but in the beginning he always came to me.

When Mark was asked this question just days before facebook’s 16th anniversary… I just hoped that in the back of his mind… he’d remember to think of me… and our promises, our partnership, the encouragement, influence and advice that I offered… but obviously it seems unlikely that he cares to remember me at all.

As for Mark’s comment on being more religious…

That’s so wonderful to hear.

But I feel like when it comes to religion… If you’re truly seeking knowledge and understanding of God your focus should be on following the word of God and self reflect… make an effort to be better and do better, make peace with others and etc.

… I just feel like anyone who is truly making an effort to be right with God… should find enough compassion and empathy in their heart to know that It’s not right to leave a person in such a vulneranle position such as the one I have been left in.

To be forgotten and ignored… especially discredited by others that knew my involvemet is absolutely dehumanizing as if I am a worthless, disposable person and my feelings and my life doesn’t matter.

Because of this my very own life story with my early involvement and silent partnership with Facebook… was stolen from me. It’s not something I can share proud n openly with my family and people I meet… because Mark has not cared to confirm things so I’d come off as a liar… or assumed I’m a crazy person like my mother.

Mark knew that I had a fear of being made out to look crazy. It’s because all my life… once people knew my Mom had Schizophrenia I’d get teased and made fun of that I’d end up crazy like her… that stuff really bothered me most of my life.

… it’s a different kind of hurt when you open up to someone about your fears and etc. and they just end up contributing to making that fear a reality.

… I don’t know for certain if Mark remembers that or not… so I can’t say for certain that any of this has been intentional.

The other day someone thought it would be nice to troll me on Facebook. Making multiple comments about “Delusional Obsession”…

It is ignorant to judge and make ridiculous assumptions about people.

I am sensitive to assumptions and accusations in relation to Mental Health. My mother has Schizophrenia. Mental Health isn’t something to laugh at.

I know what my story looks like to people that find my story hard to believe or think it’s absolutely ludacris based on lack of physical proof and public acknowledgement.

But it is what it is… unfortunately I have a sad and difficult story; a story that doesn’t seem to fit into a mould that many people expect… truth is always harder for people to believe and accept for some reason…

It’s difficult to tell the truth and be left alone in a position to look like a liar or “Delusional”… and actually have people think these untrue things.

I put my story out there for free on my own expense so people can see and understand the actual reality of my situation. Rather than keep believing a fictional story.

These days I don’t really have time and motivation to keep writting blogs… blogs never really were my thing. I have more problems in my life than I can handle right now… stuff way over my head… and that is one of the reasons I have been trying to grab Mark’s attention.

I was always there for Mark when he needed me… I gave him so much advice… and right now I wish that just this one time that I could reconnect and get some advice.

Smile by Sidewalk Prophets

“Happiness is wonderful
But it doesn’t stick around
Walkin’ on sunshine
Then here come the clouds
You can laugh or you can cry
When it all falls apart
But I believe the more you laugh
The more you heal the heart

There’s always a reason
To always choose joy
There’s something deeper
That the world can’t destroy

When you think you can’t
Get up and dance
There’s a bigger plan
And you’ve got a reason
To smile
When you think you can’t.”

My MySpace Page Got Deleted Again…

My original MySpace account got deleted again… doesn’t look like I will get it back this time.

The first time it got deleted was shortly after Mark Zuckerberg and I had our fall out…

I was able to get it back quickly…

but soon deactivated it June 15th 2005.

The reason I deactivated the account was… There were people inquiring about me to random people on my friends list. I used the name Jade as my username at the time. I had a large friend list back then on MySpace. The majority of the people on my friends list I didn’t know personally but people begain private messaging me saying there were people from California trying to obtain information on me… like my real identity… where I lived… etc. and it freaked me out… so I deactivated the account.

Facebook was just a year old then…

It wasn’t until December 7th 2005 that I reactivated the account…

I was in the process of moving out of the apartment that my Mom and I rented that we could no longer afford… it was an unexpected move. During that time I was trying to reach Mark to tell him I was moving but was unable to reconnect… that was the only reason I reactivated the account.

Then 4 months later MySpace deleted my account for the 2nd time…

awhile went buy and I was able to obtain the account again…

Only to have it deleted again for the 3rd time September 3, 2019.

Even though I no longer used the account, That account was sentimental to me… it was my original account from 2003… I was 19 years old then. I spent my spare time on it, it was my escape from real life… The way the site was designed back then allowed anyone to customize their page any way they wanted, That feature is what made me fall in love with MySpace because it allowed me to express myself freely. MySpace also allowed me to learn and experiment with HTML code… because of that everyday my profile had a different look almost everyday and that is what caught Mark Zuckerberg’s attention… he said he liked the way I designed my profile. Mark claimed that because he is colorblind it allowed him to see the features on MySpace clearly on my profile… he said that most people designed their pages too dark for him to see anything clearly.

Through that MySpace account Mark Zuckerberg and I became friends… I have a lot of memories attached to that account. Even though all the history I had on that account has been erased… just having that account was sentimental to me… now I no longer have it…

… One of many memories I have is a conversation Mark and I had a few times. We talked about how “cool” it would be to own MySpace one day…

I said it was my dream to own it, It’s because I loved MySpace so much back then… it was very different from what it is today.

I’d talk to Mark about what I’d add to MySpace if it was mine… just… day dreaming beyond wildest dreams… and Mark would say “No… MySpace doesn’t need more features n stuff it needs to be simplified.” and I remember being like NO!!!!!! It would be soooo boring then… I said if anything it needs more features to be better.

… well… look at it now… it’s simplified to hell… to the point of being absolutely useless.

In my opinion… MySpace should just be reinvented and repurposed at this point.

… MySpace is actually a perfect name for a Virtual World… a virtual reality space… maybe something that is compatible with Oculus. My imagination is running wild just thinking about the possibilities with an idea like that.

But Anyway…

I just wanted to share that little random story.

F8 2019 – The Future Is Private

It is an exciting time for facebook‘s revamp and a fresh new look.

I might be the saddest one to see the iconic shade of blue go though… Just because I was a part of making the decision when choosing that specific shade of blue.

Which is a widely unknown fact in facebook‘s history that people don’t know… in a sense it makes me feel a little more forgotten… a little more erased from facebook‘s history… so it’s a little extra sad for me to see it go…

On the bright side of things it is exciting to see facebook continuing to evolve in such a positive innovative way after 15 years.

Privacy is important to us all in varying degrees. For me privacy has always been extremely important to me.

I have always been obsessed with privacy and protecting myself hence why Mark came up with this “Jessica Alona” alias for me… which I never did like… but the thing was I never wanted my real name revealed. I just wanted to maintain my privacy more than anything and Mark understood and respected that…

I was pleased to hear the F8 announcement that facebook is focusing on being a Privacy Focused Social Platform. Building more services focused on privacy and message encryption. It is something that I have always wanted for facebook.

Being Canadian I also thought it was really cool to hear that Portal is being launched internationally starting in Canada this June and will be released elsewhere in the fall.

… for me it’s kind of funny and surreal that Mark is putting a product out into the world that has a Camera cover included with it… If he only knew the big grin I had on my face when I first saw that Portal would feature a camera cover. 😁

I have always covered my camera’s on my devices. Smartphone included. So I personally find that little feature very appealing.

As an avid gamer oddly I have never tried any of the Oculus products. I guess I don’t know exactly what I am missing. Oculus Quest looks pretty cool. There is a lot of exciting things to anticipate this year.

On a funny note: After the Zuck‘s F8 slogan “The Future is Private” I couldn’t help but wonder… Does Canada’s Matthew Good still think “The Future is X rated”?

Matthew Good – The Future is X Rated

“… I used to ride around here… up on my high horse… with all the other good little butcher boys… a plagiarist of course.
So roll over sweet thing… Like a nuclear reprisal inbound from outer space there’s a comparison here I’m trying to swing…”

Facebook 15 Years Later

Facebook 15 years later

facebook turned 15 today.

I remember the early morning of February 4th 2004 like it was yesterday. I’ll never forget how excited Mark Zuckerberg was that morning. He literally could not wait to launch thefacebook.com. I couldn’t be around for the launch because I had to work so we talked for a bit before I left for work that day.

I can’t believe it has been 15 years already. While facebook hits another milestone today without me, I hope that Mark remembered to think of me and the influence, advice, encouragement and support I put forth in the beginning of facebook… I always thought for sure by this time Mark would have attempted to reach out to me… and that we would be on talking terms again but I guess Mark doesn’t remember how much facebook actually meant to me and doesn’t seem to wonder how much it has affected my life afterwards.

Regardless of any hurt feelings I remain very proud of Mark and all the progress he has made though the years with facebook. Yes!… even though there has been times I have literally face palmed on some decisions made and wished I was able to give Mark the sound advice that he once used to value.

Through the years Mark has become a great leader, tackling hard issues and has managed to create an amazing team of the most talented, influential individuals that has helped facebook evolve into this incredible innovative platform that plays and important role in billions of people’s lives everyday around the World. From connecting with family, friends, co-workers, and etc. Through News feed, Messenger messages, Video and Non-video calls, Interacting though gaming, and facebook Groups, sharing Pictures, Videos, Thoughts, Feelings, Life Events, Fundraising, Building Brands, Launching Businesses, Selling things, Buying Things, Going viral with Funny Videos and Raising awareness on various important issues and while facebook continues to grow and evolve as always I wish Mark and everyone on the facebook team all the best… and maybe one day I won’t be so… Forgotten?.

Blue October – I Hope You’re Happy

“I’m always gonna have your back so try to remember that!
I hope you’re happy
I hope you’re good, I hope you get what you wish for and you’re well understood and whatever your progress I know you’ll be fine… I remember when the world was ours to take… I remember every word that we spoke, You right here next to me… I remember everything.” ― Blue October

The integrity behind facebook

Mark Zuckerberg recently released an article in the Wall Street Journal titled “The Facts About Facebook”.

It is a must read if you have concerns regarding the use of your data at facebook.

My personal experience being friends with Mark Zuckerberg was that he was always respectable and helpful to others. Reading this article in the Wall Street Journal by Mark makes me think back in time to 15 years ago when we were friends.

He was always determined to be of service to others because of that determination here we are today Connecting, Sharing, Helping others through Fundraising, Building Brands, Increasing Business, and etc.

It is mind blowing to think about all the good that facebook has done for Billions of people Worldwide and none of it would have been possible if it wasn’t for Mark’s drive to help others and being innovative along the way.

Through the years facebook has had it’s challenges and mistakes made. I admire Mark’s ability to be a strong leader and to follow up on issues with ultimate integrity in mind. Overall I am proud of what Mark was able to accomplish, overcome and deliver thus far with facebook.

The most important thing to me has always been my privacy. While people continue to ridicule and accuse Mark of not being trustworthy with their data. I can assure you that despite what has happened, Mark has always been a respectable person especially regarding privacy. I’m proof of that. Mark fully respected the fact that I valued my privacy from day one; Hence making up the “Jessica Alona” alias and even though things didn’t end well with our friendship/business Partnership Mark respected my wish wholeheartedly and has never revealed my true identity against my wishes. 💙

Happy 8th Birthday Beast!!!!!


I’ll never forget the conversations that Mark Zuckerberg and I had about Dog’s.
Mark and I had a lot of things in common, One of the things we had in common was we both loved Sheepdogs. One time we were discussing what kind of dogs we liked. I firstly said a West Highland Terrier followed by an Old English Sheepdog. Mark then told me he had a Westie back home at his parents, and he liked sheepdog’s too. I remember laughing about that. Mark started googling Sheepdog’s and said he wanted a Hungarian Sheepdog one day. I remember saying good luck grooming it… and tried talking him into considering an Old English Sheepdog instead. SORRY!! about that Beast! I guess you can say you were destined to be a Chan-Zuckerberg! You are one lucky Puli! HAPPY 8th BIRTHDAY!

15 years ago on this day Jan 3, 2004.

MZ_JA_1_White center

I never thought that 15 years later…
The first week of January 2004 would end up being one of the most memorable times for me in my life. It was the beginning of a New Year, It was exciting to think that 2004 was going to be the greatest year my life… with all the promises Mark Zuckerberg made me while we were discussing the upcoming launch of thefacebook.com Mark lit the biggest spark of hope in my heart that my struggles in life will soon be over. I was also turning 20 years old in a few days and I was being a bit of a smartass to Mark about it. I remember joking around with Mark about him being so young and how I will no longer be a teenager in a few days but He will still be one for 5 more months. Even though Mark was only 5 months younger than I, I liked being silly teasing Mark about being younger and looking about 14 or 16 years old at 19.

When we were discussing the anticipated launch of thefacebook.com and making plans I mentioned that my birthday was in a few days. Mark said he didn’t realize that my birthday was coming up so soon, He then said “If I would have thought of it, We could have lunched thefacebook.com on the 5th a day before your birthday but with your birthday 3 days away that is way too early to launch thefacebook.com .”

Even though it was impossible, That was the most thoughtful thought in the World… It made me feel very appreciated and valued for the help and support that I offered Mark. Nobody had ever made me feel valued, listened to and important like Mark had often made me feel.

During the evening Mark and I had gotten into some deep discussions about the future… Mark said if thefacebook.com really takes off He’ll help me out and make me really rich. Right away I said “I don’t believe you.” because it sounded too good to be true. Mark replied “I’m serious, I won’t pass up the opportunity to change your life.” I then said “I’d seriously be forever thankful if he made me a Millionaire.” That’s when he corrected me and said “I wouldn’t make you a millionaire…” followed by a long pause which in the moment felt like forever… then followed up with saying “I’d make you a Billionaire.” Keep in mind none of us really knew the real potential… This was just 2 teenagers day dreaming together of possibilities and etc. but the day dream bubble popped when reality swooped on in real quick after he said that so I said “I don’t have that kind of luck in life.” That is when I also said “One day you are going to forget about me and you will never honor your promise that you made me. Because nobody ever remembers the people that were there for them in the beginning of their success.” I said that because that is what I believed to be true. Mark replied with disbelief in what I had just said and asked me why I had thought that way and I said “I’m always forgotten by people.” and Mark reassured me that moment that he would never forget me and will honor his promise to me no matter what.

I said thefacebook.com will be so big that he will end up being super rich and famous… We’d lose touch and I will never be able to reach him ever again. Because he’d be so sheltered and will probably even have bodyguards and everything making it impossible for me to ever reach out to him successfully.
Mark laughed and said “I doubt I will be that Rich and famous… it’s not like I’d be building things like Bill Gates.” I said “That doesn’t matter… I just have a feeling thefacebook.com will be huge.”
I then said “We need to make plans now that we will never lose touch.” Mark laughed and said “We won’t lose touch.” I said “I really fear that we will… and we need to make sure it doesn’t happen.” so we discussed several different ways that I could always try to reach him… one of the agreements was to keep the email account that we communicated through active for the next 10 years… just so I will always have that security knowing I will never be able to lose touch with him no matter what… at the time I didn’t have a cellphone we didn’t text we e-mailed, and of course there where several other plans in place beside that.

Looking back How right was I about everything?.

During our more serious discussions during the first week of January Mark wanted to figure out how to divide shares in thefacebook.com among investors and offered me a small percentage of his personal shares… He said I’d be a silent partner that way. While I was very ecstatic about the offer I also felt a lot of doubt. I really did so in that moment I got up off my computer chair and knelt down on the side of my bed and prayed really hard… like REALLY REALLY HARD to God that… I hope that he was listening to everything Mark and I had been discussing… and that Facebook really would be the biggest success… and that all these promises would come true so that I wouldn’t have to struggle in life anymore.

Life was just so hard for me… and still is… in fact it got even harder bearing this burden I’ve kept to myself all these years, as well as the various forms of vulnerability that comes with it all. For example, I opened up about my story and my true identity to a well known and respected professor from Harvard. Long story short a year ago he flew down to my city uninvited and unannounced and was peering through the windows of my home. After that I blocked him across all forms of social media. I attempted to expose him but he threatened to sue me for Defamation of character, Slander and Libel. So what does a poor vulnerable girl with all credibility taken from her do?…EXACTLY!!… Nothing. I can’t even mention who he is or say all the terrible things he has done. He added alot of stress to my life and while I lose sleep over this individual every night, There is no justice for myself and many others, and that is the latest struggle added to my life. This is why I never wanted to publicly reveal my true identity to anyone, but I thought if this man is from Harvard and well respected I could trust him, Bad mistake.

Now back to the main story as I was praying I heard Mark sending several more messages so I hurried up with my prayers so I could get up to read what Mark was saying which turned out to be more promises… and more reassurance. He then said he had to go and we said goodbye for the night and that is when I immediately went to my Mom’s room and jumped on her bed and layed beside her… and said “Mark Zuckerberg wants to make me a Billionaire! One day. Not a Millionaire but a BILLIONAIRE MOM!” my Mom looked at me in disbelief and said “I don’t believe that.” I said “No really Mom! he’s a computer genius! He has made several websites and things already! and he really promised to help us better our lives.” My Mom then said “What is his name again?” I said “Mark Elliot Zuckerberg.” I then said “Lets write his name down on your Calendar so we never forget this day.” So on My Mom’s 2004 Calendar on the month of January she wrote Mark Elliot Zuckerberg.

A year later the early months of 2005 my fears became a reality our friendship and communication got severed due to a huge disagreement.

Few months later December 2005 my Mom and I moved out of our apartment because we couldn’t afford the rent. A few years later My Mom was cleaning her room and That calendar ended up on a table in her room and happened to be opened on that page. I was in my bedroom when my brother happened to walk into my Mom’s bedroom He then glanced over at the calendar and I heard him say “Mom, Why is Mark Zuckerberg’s name written on your calendar? You don’t know who Mark Zuckerberg is.” I heard my Mom reply “Your sister made me write his name down a long time ago.” My brother then immediately walked into my room and said “Why would you get Mom to write Mark Zuckerberg’s name on her Calendar?” I simply said “Because he was my friend.” and I didn’t bother saying anything else about it. My brother looked at me and said “YEAH! OOOKAY! you aren’t even on thefacebook.com ” I said “That is because I was the first person to ever delete my facebook account.” He just said “Whatever.”

Shortly after that I signed up for a new facebook account and that was when I attempted to reach out to Mark Zuckerberg but Dustin stepped in and humiliated me publicly on Mark’s facebook wall for all to see… this was approx. 2006 or 2007. It seriously devastated me I was so upset that someone could be so cruel to me.

So just like every New Year on this day… I relive those memories and Hope that Mark will remember me as facebooks anniversary approaches.

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